November 24, 2006

Today's Special

Faith must (not) be blind

So, I said, 'Ask not how you can serve your religion, but how does your religion serve you?'

What if, what if you die only to learn that God, too, can break his promise? It shouldn't even matter. Because, my silly friend, you are already dead by then. Unless there's another even higher being that you can lodge a complaint against God with. But, why risk being fooled twice?

As for me, my religion serves only to make me feel small, and my all my life's problems insignificant. It doesn't make me feel better. It just convinces me to accept it.

And you asked, 'Isn't that a resignation to fate?'

And I replied, 'Aren't all religions about being resigned to a fate or something, or someone?'

xxx

Eat, drink; walk, shop. Loneliness.

He said, 'I hope your happiness lasts till the wedding.'

I said, 'I hope it lasts through your marriage. But at least, until your wedding.'

I'm happy for you too. You were smiling, you were making noise, you were enthusiastic.

I walked alone, amidst the early X'mas shoppers. The path opened up to the steps of memory lane. I remembered helping a couple take a photograph of them at the tree, last X'mas. I remembered you waited while I helped them.

I slowed down. I stared into the past. I crossed my arms, attempted to embrace myself. Music was blasting from the earphones. I saw loneliness from your happiness.

I became a picture of loneliness.

xxx

If a good life's too expensive, you can get me these.

I don't mind having them for X'mas this year. And I can't get them myself. Because, I am saving up for my new toy. So, if you can't give me any one of these, then, I'd just allocate my next splurge-fund to these titles (you scrooge!):

1. Carry Me Down by M.J Hyland
2. Moral Disorder by Margaret Atwood
3. We Need To Talk About Kelvin by Lionel Shriver
4. Prozac Nation by Elizabeth Wurtzel (Book preferred but won't mind VCD)
5. The Quiet Room by Lori Schiller and Amanda Bennett
6. Insecure At Last by Eve Ensler

xxx

Everyone should have someone like you

So that everyone can hide a chuckle during a superbly lame and boring workshop. So that everyone can waste 8 minutes of their life telling you about the hidden message in a dream of you. And then, shudder at the indefinitely horrifying impossibility together.

Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 23:24